really use use my voice, and I spoke up, and I said, “Hey, wait a minute! Can we all just get on the same page? Like, what’s going on here? You guys are saying this, but that’s absolutely counter to what these guys are saying. So, can we come up with a plan where we’re all on the same page? And I really just, you know, talked to the nurse. I had an amazing nurse. I said, “I really just need to hold my baby. She’s like, we can make that happen. And at this point, he was intubated. He had tubes coming out of him, and those amazing nurses in the the NICU just were like, we’re gonna, we’re have a seat, Mama. We’re gonna get you to hold this baby, because my soul needed to just connect with this beautiful little child, and so that was kind of my awakening, and then I had a dear friend of mine that had been trying to train me in Reiki, and I’m like, “That’s cute for you, but that’s not really my thing. But with my son, she’s like, “He’s having trouble getting grounded. You’re going to need to do Reiki. I want to teach you Reiki. I was like, “There’s nothing you won’t do for your child as a mom. There’s nothing I won’t do for my children. So I learned Reiki, and I dove into nutrition because I know nutrition is important for cellular health, for the brain, for development. So dove into nutrition, got my first nutrition certification. I became a personal trainer because my son was having trouble, didn’t move his right side. So I wanted to understand the body and how I can help him get strong and all that. I dove into neurology and understanding the brain and the different areas of the brain and what they control.

 

Jennifer Tolo  08:30

So it really, again, it was like, all right, let your soul guide you here, let your child soul guide you. And it also was interesting because my oldest son, my firstborn, was like the perfect child, right? And so you had all these, all these thoughts and expectations about how life was supposed to be, how kids were supposed to be. My child is going to do this, and so this experience really taught me I have to let go of expectations. I have to just meet my child and let him tell me and show me who he is and what he needs. He wound up having massive cognitive behavioral challenges, learning disabilities, all that. And you know, a couple years after this event, my third son, same day I was found found out my fourth son, my fourth child was a boy, I found out my third son had leukemia, and again, my mother’s brain wouldn’t go there. I know the signs, but I didn’t see them because I didn’t want to see them, right? As a as a mom, and so, but at this point, I already had the tools that I needed to help guide us through this. I knew about nutrition, so when the nutritionist said to me, “Just get calories in them, and families would be waiting for their children after procedures with Dunkin’ Donut or with McDonald’s or Dairy Queen and Smiles, I’d be like, “No, I need to get good quality nutrition because as the chemotherapy is.” Killing all of his cells, I need good nutrition to help rebuild this. So I really I did Reiki on him every single day, and he never had the really bad side effects. I learned about mindfulness for myself to really take care of myself because I if I let myself get too far ahead, it was overwhelming, and I really needed because I was growing a baby inside of me. I had to really be present, and I had to really take care of myself in this. So it was all quite the awakening for me, and it really showed me kind of about the importance of self care, the importance of managing stress and the importance of really checking your expectations and being more present in your life, and the importance of lifestyle for health and well-being. So, and I’m happy to say, my kids, you know, my oldest is 26. The one that has stroke is 24. The one that had leukemia is 21, and my baby’s 18, and they’re all doing great.

 

Manon Bolliger  11:05

Wow!

 

Jennifer Tolo  11:06

Yeah,

 

Manon Bolliger  11:07

that’s quite a eventful. Yeah,

 

Jennifer Tolo  11:12

yeah, yeah. Well, it’s what I needed to to like. Hey, administration’s not your role. Like that’s not your calling, right? You’re not going to fix healthcare through systems, right? That’s not the way to fix healthcare. You’re going to fix healthcare by reconnecting to the roots and prevention and connection and self awareness, and that that’s really at the heart of health and well being. It’s not something you get outside of you or you fix. It’s something you have to cultivate. Yeah.

 

Manon Bolliger  11:44

Do you think that’s where we’re going now? This, the I don’t mean the established. I think it’s going down, but yeah. But the like, I guess the those who have chosen different paths and are aware that yeah, there’s a limitation to a money making industry. Yeah,

 

Jennifer Tolo  12:11

well, it’s not really. I mean, it’s crazy to think about the people that are making the money. I mean, I I can I am married to a surgeon, okay, and I know that back in the day, surgeons made tons of money, and they but they’ve gone to school for a long time. They have a skill set different than everybody. If you think about it, like plumber, I have a good friend of mine that’s a plumber. He makes what my husband makes, right? Yeah, so I think that the money making is in the pharmaceuticals. I agree. I don’t think.

 

Manon Bolliger  12:44

I agree. It’s in

 

Jennifer Tolo  12:47

the systems. Yeah,

 

Manon Bolliger  12:48

correct. Yeah, absolutely. It’s not the doctors per se. I mean, you know, there are sometimes money grab opportunities, but but that’s not the that’s not the problem. You know, the problem is way more systemic.

 

Jennifer Tolo  13:06

Well, and I think it’s it’s the way that we are also teaching. So I was teaching in a nursing school for a while. I took this semester off, but for five years I’ve been teaching holistic and complementary approaches to health and healing in the nursing school, and it was a very popular class. I helped develop a minor that was a an integrative health minor. It’s people are hungry for this. I think. I think that people are recognizing. I don’t want to take all the pills. I don’t feel good taking the pills. I want to be proactive in my health. But at the same token, one thing that I discovered, and my when I first started my my business, I started a company called Butterfly Family Wellness, really looking at more of the nutritional, and physical, and mental aspects of health and well being. But what I found was so many of the women, the root of so much of it was stress, and you know, even in so many, when I think about so many of like even in critical care, like a lot, the root of so much of our health disturbances is stress. Whether it’s nutritional stress, whether it’s environmental stress, emotional stress, spiritual stress, physical stress, but stress was at the root of it. So I really kind of became a stress and resiliency expert because of that. Because I realized even for myself, I had migraine headaches, irritable bowel syndrome. I had a migraine headache. I had migraines so badly that I thought I was having a stroke, and I cured myself of this by learning to manage my stress. You know, my my my hydration, my you know my emotional stress, my physical stress. I was over exercising, under eating, and just tapping out my body. So, but I feel. Like when I teach in the nursing school, one of the big things is people say, “Oh, healthcare costs, and they think it’s because doctors are making so much money.

 

Manon Bolliger  15:08

They

 

Jennifer Tolo  15:09

talk about universal care; everybody needs healthcare. I was like, “Well, here’s the thing: there’s not enough resources to go around at this point. And if we, when you look at health, and you look at what is driving healthcare costs so high. It’s chronic disease. It’s preventable diseases, and it’s because we, as healthcare professionals in the mainstream-not in the holistic world, but in the mainstream-have been taught to see a problem, fix it. That there is a pill for an ill, or cut it out, right? But we haven’t looked at what the root cause is. We haven’t looked at okay, what are the lifestyle modifications that we can make? I mean, I was talking to somebody. Said, yeah, my doctor told me to get more fiber. Where? How do I get more fiber in my diet? And I’m like, that’s that’s the thing is we we know enough to say yeah, lose weight, exercise more, eat better, right? But but a lot of medical practitioners do not have the knowledge. There was a study done about this. They don’t have the knowledge to say, okay, but how do you do that? Let’s get specific about how you’re going to do that. So I feel like there are as far as your question recircling back to that your question about are we getting are do we think do I think we’re getting there I think there’s an interest I think there’s a lot of physicians nurse practitioners PAs there’s naturopaths out there there’s functional medical doctors there are a lot of people that are seeing that we have to get back to root cause medicine. That we have to get back to lifestyle. I think the systems have a long way to go. I think that there are some extremes on both ends. On the holistic realm, there are some extremes that can sometimes pull us out of balance, and on the medical, the traditional medical practice, there are some extremes as we talked about, right? That are like aggressive, right? So I feel like as everything, when you have extremes, we have to start to settle, and I feel like it’s starting to settle where we’re starting to get a little bit more connected with ourselves, but it’s hard because it requires the individual instead of to be a passive observer of their life and looking to others to fix them. It requires people to be active co-creators, co-directors of their life, and to be accountable for their choices. Your choice is your greatest superpower.

 

Manon Bolliger  17:45

Yeah, and I, I think you know. Just add to that, and I, I agree with what you’re saying, is that as long as we are in the delusion that the the infrastructure is the the god of knowing, you know, or as Fauci says, I am, I am the what did he say? I am the medicine. No, I am the I am the science. Yes, sorry, you know. No, not yeah, yeah. You know, I think it’s very hard to stop the brainwashing that we have undergone. You know, in other words, when the medical system married the marketing system, and they did, you know, create the problem for which then we have COVID, you know, create a problem for which we then have a solution, which of course we prepared long before we created that problem because we already had the, you know, the faulty tests and the this and they they had all the marketing all organized before they had their preemptive meeting. They had Fauci warn that this was going to happen. Like whatever. There’s enough. If you’re paying attention, there’s enough evidence that this is a show. I mean, but it’s not a power.

 

Jennifer Tolo  19:16

It’s a power. It’s a power struggle. It’s a power grab. Yeah,

 

Manon Bolliger  19:20

it is, and the thing is that if hospitals and institutions follow mandates that are from these false gods, basically, and shut down like the media, any any you know normal-minded doctor who says you know, and there’s many of them who have said no, no, no, this is going to cause havoc. Now we have turbo deaths. We have, but they they’re already ready for that, right? Not to heal it or cure it, God forbid, but to do what they do. And this is the thing: is like when. The system’s based on money, ultimately, and it’s been power

 

Jennifer Tolo  20:05

and power and control and control.

 

Manon Bolliger  20:09

It’s been infiltrated, you know. And I think it’s not the your husband didn’t wake up one day and say, “I’m just going to be this powerful. No, he wanted to help people, right? Like, you know, same as as me in my industry, but and you and and the thing is that, but we’re taken over. You know, like the naturopaths are taken over,

 

Jennifer Tolo  20:33

which is why we have this burnout, this epidemic of burnout, because people. It’s like when your soul and your purpose is no longer aligned with your work because there are obstacles preventing you from doing what you know to be the right thing to do. It’s this moral dilemma, and and it’s hard. And and as we saw, you know, during COVID, there were a lot of voices being shut down. And I am a true believer that education and information is really the key to health and well-being. Like we need to educate people, right? You need to have varying and conversation, conversation to kind of tease out because this person’s truth is not the same as this person’s truth, but the real truth, when you talk about it, is somewhere in the middle,

 

Manon Bolliger  21:28

right?

 

Jennifer Tolo  21:28

Yeah,

 

Manon Bolliger  21:30

but I think too with education, you know, because I know I I believe in education too, and I was like educating people. Yeah, that’s what I

 

Jennifer Tolo  21:38

mean. Yeah,

 

Manon Bolliger  21:39

when they’re Brainwashed.

 

Jennifer Tolo  21:42

Yes,

 

Manon Bolliger  21:43

you’re in psyop. You education doesn’t work, and that’s the thing. Is they’ve been in this model for over 30 years in the medical model, brainwashing people. You’re up against a massive thing.

 

Jennifer Tolo  21:58

Yeah,

 

Manon Bolliger  21:59

that that’s why we’re in this, you know. It’s it’s been whatever it’s over 60 years trying to dismantle this crazy thing that we’re in, you know. And

 

Jennifer Tolo  22:11

well, and again, you have these extremes of belief. You have these people that think, um, you know, everybody has a right to healthcare and to being well, but those same people aren’t really into personal accountability, right? And recognizing their role in their own health and well-being, right? And their role in and and the system’s role in making people unwell,

 

Manon Bolliger  22:36

yeah, right, yeah.

 

Jennifer Tolo  22:38

And fear, fear is one of the biggest stressors out there, and you know, COVID was one big fear mongering event. Whether it was fear of the vaccine, fear of getting COVID, fear of like it was fear all over the place. I mean, I had people constantly saying to me, “What should I do? Should I take the vaccine? Should I not get the vaccine? And I said, “That’s a personal decision, but you really have to check in with yourself and ask yourself, what am I worried about? Like, what am I afraid of? And then,

 

Manon Bolliger  23:07

Manon Bolliger here, and I want to thank you for taking actionable steps towards engaging your healing journey and helping others discover their path by watching, sharing, subscribing, and reviewing these podcasts. Every review and share helps spread the word on these different perspectives and choices and options for healing. And to thank you, I’d like to invite you to sign up to my free seven sequence email tips on health and healing for everyday life, and you can go to healerscafe.com. Tips. Thanks so much.

 

Jennifer Tolo  23:52

Really tune into what feels right for me, what works for my. You know, because there are a lot of people that said if I don’t take the vaccine, I’m not gonna. I’m gonna lose my job if I don’t get if my kids don’t get the vaccine. They can’t go to school. If I don’t do this, I can’t travel, and I’ve got to travel for my job. Like there was a lot of factors that were adding to the stress and the overwhelm. And they aren’t stressed and overwhelmed. You can’t make the best decisions.

 

Manon Bolliger  24:17

No, no, exactly. And they shouldn’t be. Those are not the factors we should take into account on whether something is healthy for us. Never mind preventative. Apparently, it wasn’t even one of the things they tested. You know, and a

 

Jennifer Tolo  24:34

vaccine doesn’t stop you from getting it.

 

Manon Bolliger  24:37

Then you have to ask a few questions. Yeah. Sorry, I’m laughing, but I mean now the turbot cancers are going wild, right? And and doctors are still like going. I don’t. There’s a lot of them, but it’s like they will not talk about the thing that highly likely, you know, according to those people are afraid

 

Jennifer Tolo  24:58

to because of course. And you speak out against the system, they come for you. You know, they come at you,

 

Manon Bolliger  25:06

and they do. And and that’s I think the, you know, that’s why the problem is much bigger, right? Like that’s why is a you know, and I think it takes a a complete takedown of this system, I’m hoping for that.

 

Jennifer Tolo  25:23

I agree, and I think actually it transcends just healthcare. It’s it you know politically, it’s educationally, it’s like there’s so many different things, and again, we need to get back to common sense. We have to get back to not reactivity, but responsiveness and and responsibility. Like personal, like I need to educate myself. I need to inform myself. I need to understand and not react to what’s going on. But I need to kind of get as much information as I need to make informed choices, to make informed decisions. So yeah, yeah, yeah,

 

Manon Bolliger  26:02

yeah, and it’s funny because now you know I know there’s a lot of women in that I know of that are just having babies, and you know, and when I was at that stage, if somebody gave me should read about this or that, I would always read it because I would feel like, well, yeah, you know, I don’t have to accept it. I can choose to go deeper in it if it resonates. But I will, I will do everything I can as a mother to make sure that I will will have said I’ve done everything I can, including my instinct, everything you know, right? Which is why your your story is so touching, you know. And the nowadays it’s like no, no, I don’t want to read anything if it’s negative, or if it’s now they’ve got people conspiracy theorists, or oh, you believe in now. You have to belong to a party to have. You know, it’s like it’s so sick.

 

Jennifer Tolo  27:10

The art of conversation seems to have

 

Manon Bolliger  27:13

vanished, gotten

 

Jennifer Tolo  27:15

lost. But I do believe that I am hopeful that it will come back. I am hopeful that we can, because what I think it is, honestly, I really believe that it’s just this state of overwhelm. If you think about survival mode, and so many people are in survival mode right now. Survival mode is fight, see, or freeze, and the freeze is avoid. Right? I don’t want to. I can’t. I don’t want to deal with it. So, or I’m just gonna kind of get go along to get along. the The flight is again the avoidance or the like. Nope, don’t talk to me. I don’t want to look at this stuff because I don’t want to know any differently. And then the fight is the anger, and the attachment and the blame and the all of that, and I feel like it is survival mode. We have cultivated this culture of automated survival mode, where people, when you’re in survival mode, you can’t think properly. You don’t have rational thought. You are reactive. You are emotional. You are triggered.

 

Manon Bolliger  28:20

Yeah,

 

Jennifer Tolo  28:20

and it’s not good for any of

 

Manon Bolliger  28:24

1. No,

 

Jennifer Tolo  28:25

you know.

 

Manon Bolliger  28:26

Yeah, I mean, there’s a

 

Jennifer Tolo  28:27

yeah,

 

Manon Bolliger  28:28

yeah, and survival mode comes from being attacked. One one thing, sure. Also, surviving and look at the economy we’re in. I mean, people can’t afford to buy food. They can’t afford their mortgages. They can’t afford the rents. They can’t like. I don’t know where you live. I live in Canada, and

 

Jennifer Tolo  28:46

I live in Massachusetts. So

 

Manon Bolliger  28:48

okay. Oh yeah. Oh, we have things to compare. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh. Anyway. Yeah. Oh, special places. Um. Anyway. Yeah. So like, but it’s yeah. How can they do anything else but just try and get rid of the world so that they just do what they got to do? Because how can they raise their little kids if they’re busy reading things? You know, getting like your

 

Jennifer Tolo  29:15

greatest power is in your voice and in your choices. That’s where your superpower is, and when we don’t speak up, when we aren’t informed, and we don’t challenge, and we don’t speak up, and we’re not making informed choices, because the problem-it’s not the problem started somewhere, and the solutions are somewhere. And when we just want to point fingers and blame, and we follow the narrative that is being laid out for us, then we become part of the problem instead of part of the solution.

 

Manon Bolliger  29:49

Absolutely, and I don’t think those people are there. They don’t see that yet. I also

 

Jennifer Tolo  29:57

think it’s it’s hard to see it when you’re. Being fed a narrative when you’re being fed, and you and you don’t. I was just saying to somebody, boy, I wish I was saying this to my husband. I’m like, I really wish the algorithms of social media instead of giving you more of what you’re looking at.

 

Manon Bolliger  30:16

Yeah, I would love

 

Jennifer Tolo  30:18

it if they could give you the opposite, like just so you could see two different perspectives.

 

Manon Bolliger  30:24

I so agree with that. I

 

Jennifer Tolo  30:26

would love that. You know, now would people turn it off, or would people just start getting used to that instead of this information bias where you’re just fed the same information, you start to believe it to be true.

 

Manon Bolliger  30:40

Yeah.

 

Jennifer Tolo  30:40

Or and then when something comes in to counter that belief or to challenge that belief, it throws you into a spiral because

 

Manon Bolliger  30:50

yeah,

 

Jennifer Tolo  30:50

threatening your safety and security, right?

 

Manon Bolliger  30:53

But no, absolutely, and and I mean it’s funny because I have you know joined different things that I know are opposing opposite points of view to try and create the madness, you know.

 

Jennifer Tolo  31:05

Yes, me too.

 

Manon Bolliger  31:06

But where it doesn’t work, I think, is in the actual suppression of real medical information.

 

Jennifer Tolo  31:16

Agreed.

 

Manon Bolliger  31:16

You know, and that’s where we we need to get like the 1000s of studies that were made, you know that’s.

 

Jennifer Tolo  31:24

But I will also say I’m going through this actually currently with my husband. So my husband has prostate cancer, and he had a prostatectomy, and he is realized after the prostatectomy that his PSA, so his prostate hormone was elevated, which means that he’s still got the cells in his body, so he’s got metastases. And we have a good friend of ours that’s a functional doctor, and they’re not functional; they’re functional, not even a medical person, but a functional person, and they’re into biohacking, and they’re into the latest this and that, and they’re like, you need to be on a ketogenic diet and reading all these books and getting all this information about how starving the cancer cells of any glucose is really how you stop the spread of cancer and all this. And I’m listening and and I’ve read the studies and I’ve I’ve looked at some of the studies, but there are studies about this and there are studies about this, and that’s the point. Is like we are bio individuals, so some of that information, yes, that worked on these people, but it doesn’t necessarily mean. So, in the midst of all this, we have to merge science and intuition, because, and that’s what I said to my husband. Listen, tune into yourself, and does it feel like like he’s doing some crazy sardine fast right now? Three days of of just eating sardines, one can of sardines a day, and fasting to get into ketosis. And I was like, you’re a busy surgeon. When you’re in ketosis, your body goes into this ketogenic flu. You need to be sharp for the stuff that you’re doing, do you think this is the right thing for your lifestyle, right? And and really doing a lot of like check in with yourself. Don’t just listen to what this person’s telling you because their their demands on their their life is different than your life. Their their predispositions. My husband has high cholesterol. My husband doesn’t eat a lot of dairy, doesn’t he? You know, so I’m like, you have to look at your lifestyle, your preferences, your biomarker, your own biomarkers, your own genetic makeup, and decide intuitively: is this the right thing for me? You can’t just go. And there’s research to support pretty much anything you want to support out there. And that’s the thing is like sifting through all the research because research is great, but it’s not enough.

 

Manon Bolliger  33:48

No, no, I don’t disagree with you. But you know the what you’re raising with your husband too. You could say, well, the and I’m not supporting the sardine diet. I’m just saying. I mean, okay, I

 

Jennifer Tolo  33:59

couldn’t even eat one sardine alone, a can of them.

 

Manon Bolliger  34:02

I I love sardines.

 

Manon Bolliger  34:04

No, for me it’s it’s not the sardines. It’s just the the idea, you know. Because I I hear you say it, and then it’s like, you know, he can’t do his job if he’s you know if he’s not functioning well because of this diet, and then I’m thinking, like, what a crazy society that a doctor can’t take time off to heal themselves a little bit, you know. Never mind the diet; I’m not guessing one, but let’s say he associated to that, right? And you know there are. I’m sure there’s the research to show that that too works, right? But it’s the it’s the a little bit of time for real self care, right? Which a lot of people in health don’t take, right?

 

Jennifer Tolo  34:57

He has backed off of. His schedule. He’s cut down on his schedule, but you know what it is. It’s again, why do we go into medicine? Why do we go into healthcare? Because we want to help people. And so he’s got. I mean, he’s. I’m going to toot his horn. He’s an excellent surgeon. He’s a great human being, and he really connects people. People want to see him. People wait for a long time to see him, and he doesn’t want to let anybody down. He did take he took a whole month off after his surgery, and that was huge for him. And I remember talking to him about okay, now we need to set some better boundaries at work so you don’t get overloaded. And he did in the beginning, and then he was right back into that crazy schedule again. And then this happens, and I’m a big believer that things happen for a reason, and there’s a message in everything, and so there’s something to this for him, right? And there’s something to that, yeah. The self care, and he is like he’s that’s again again for him. His idea of self care is going out for a run. He’s a loves photography, so he’s been prioritizing. He keeps a camera in his car, and if he’s driving to work, we happen to live right by the ocean. And if he’s driving to work and he sees a sun, the sunrise like near where the ocean is, and it calls to him, he’ll take it a little detour before he gets on the highway to take a picture. Just that’s like his, and that’s something that we talked about, and he started to incorporate into his life, that’s self care for him. But the boundaries and the setting boundaries, I think, for so many people, especially high achieving people, high functioning people, that’s really hard. So he’s working on that. Yeah,

 

Manon Bolliger  36:37

yeah, yeah. So you know, we’re over our time. But if you still have time, I’m just going to make this two episodes.

 

Jennifer Tolo  36:44

Oh, okay. Yep, I do. Yeah,

 

Manon Bolliger  36:46

because I feel like these are really important subjects, and it’s hard to start at the beginning with that. And I feel like this is really, you know, so needed to have these discussions out loud. You know.

 

Jennifer Tolo  37:00

Yes, absolutely. I’ve got about 1010, a little bit over 10 minutes. Yeah, because I got a client. Sure, that’ll that’ll be four or five. Yeah. Okay.

 

Manon Bolliger  37:07

Okay. So I was going to ask you. Yeah. So you went through, you know, quite an experience. I mean, both of you with your your children. When did you realize, or did you experience it, knowing that you will understand why you’ve gone through this eventually, or like that? You just there was the faith that it was going to make sense at some point, or give you some. How does that work for you?

 

Jennifer Tolo  37:42

Yeah, so I have always been a pretty positive person. Always really tried to focus on the positive and what can I control because I believe that that really does make an impact in your life if you’re open to possibilities. I. I got with this awakening when my son had the stroke. I got really connected to channeling and understanding messages, soul messages, soul guidance, and that’s a big thing that I do now. Is I help people connect to what the subtle messages of the mind, the body, and the spirit are, and the soul, I can channel all that. But I hid that part of me for a while. But through all of my own healing work to heal myself, because I I was in stress overload. I was completely overwhelmed. I was giving and giving and giving and giving and giving that my own health started to suffer, and so it was through my own healing that I realized I had to go through what I went through in order to understand where the gaps in healthcare were, so I can bridge those gaps. I am an experiential learner, so if somebody told me something, I’d be like, “Yeah, okay, okay. But I had to experience it for myself, and I feel like you know, I I love I talk to my clients a lot because when we learn these new tools and we we have these new awarenesses and we have this kind of deeper connection, and we understand what the limiting beliefs were and what the belief systems that would hold us back. We understand what the hidden stressors of our life are. We understand all that, which is a big part of the work that I do with people. I feel like we’re on this like spiral staircase of life, and as we learn and we experience something and we grow, we gain wisdom. And as we gain wisdom, maybe we hit a challenge that was a similar challenge or a big challenge, and it’s like life’s presenting us with this mirror moment to say, “Okay, can you?” Practice what you’ve learned. Can you put this experience into like learning and and up level so you can go to the next level of this spiral staircase, or are you going to get pulled back into those old patterns and limiting beliefs? What you know? What are you going to do? And if you get pulled back, it’s like chutes and ladders. You like slide down the ladder, right? And you go back, and you like just lost a level. Where I feel like every challenge is the my life, life, the universe’s way of helping me practice what I’ve learned and up level to use it, and I and so I feel like what I went through with my kids helped me to realize this intuition, these gifts that I have, this connection that I have, you know, angelic messengers, the soul, all of that-that’s where my power is, and that’s what makes me really a great coach. Is that I’m able to help people, women, connect with that. Had I not gone through what I went through, I’d still be hiding that part of myself. I’d still be suppressing that part of myself.

 

Manon Bolliger  41:22

Right, right.

 

Jennifer Tolo  41:23

So I feel like there is always a purpose to the pain. There is always a message in the mess. And did I always know that? I, I, I’m not gonna lie. I’ve had little pity parties for myself, and like those moments of like, why is this happening to me? But I don’t allow myself to hang out there.

 

Manon Bolliger  41:45

No, I

 

Jennifer Tolo  41:46

give myself a minute to feel what I’m feeling, and then I go okay. But what is like? Let’s take a step back. I talk about making a brain break. That’s a big part of what I do, and my signature ABCs are a part of that, but the brain break is: we need to beyond just the stress management of calming our nervous system with breath. We then need to connect with what are those thoughts that are spiraling in my mind, and we have to interrupt those thoughts because that’s our ego mind that’s trying to keep us safe. So, making a brain break is taking a minute to just pause, notice the thoughts, don’t attach to them, step back from them, and go, okay. But what else could be true here? What else could be going on here? And then what is one thing that I can do that I am in control of? That I what what is one choice that I can make in this moment to get me where I’d like to be, or to move me through this, and that’s where you start to reclaim your power. But you have to make that brain break instead of getting pulled into that spiraling stories, thoughts, the what ifs, the the scenarios that our ego mind likes to create for

 

Manon Bolliger  43:00

us, and

 

Jennifer Tolo  43:01

that’s really what creates the stress. So making that brain break is what can help us kind of step back and reclaim our power over that.

 

Manon Bolliger  43:10

Just like stepping out of the movie, yeah,

 

Jennifer Tolo  43:14

exactly, exactly. Pump the brakes, and I like to say, flip the script. Like if you don’t like flip the script,

 

Manon Bolliger  43:20

I know. Well, I actively do that with my dreams, so you you can do it with your life. You know. Yes,

 

Jennifer Tolo  43:26

absolutely, you can. So

 

Manon Bolliger  43:28

before you go, A B C. What is that?

 

Jennifer Tolo  43:32

So the A B C’s are part of my pause method, which is being present. You know, pausing, being present in your life, and the A is awareness-being aware of what am I feeling right now, what am I experiencing, what am I thinking right now, what’s going on, am I safe, am I, or am I not safe? And then that’s the awareness piece. And then the B is balancing your nervous system through breath and mindset, balancing both, taking a breather to reset your nervous system, but then balance the thoughts that are create that are going in your mind, right? The brain break, and then C is connection. Connect to what it is that you need, what choices you have, and what you’re actually in control of in the moment, and so that’s where you can start to reclaim your power of your life. When I was a nurse, you know, you learn ABCs of life: airway, breathing, circulation, and that’s how we, you know. So I’m like, okay, this stress management, because stress is the root of many people’s illness and and imbalance. I created the ABCs as another algorithm to just kind of reconnect to ourselves and to the moment.

 

Manon Bolliger  44:53

Okay, well, that was very informative. And thanks for hanging out a bit longer. And

 

Jennifer Tolo  45:03

pleasure.

 

Manon Bolliger  45:03

Yeah. And how? So how do people get hold of you at this stage of the game?

 

Jennifer Tolo  45:09

Yes, you can go onto my website jenniferren w r e n tolo t o l o.com, or you can check me out on Instagram at jenrentolo or LinkedIn Jennifer dash Tolo dash R N, but I’d love to connect with anybody. I have a I can send you too. I have a it’s called the Soulful Superwoman Playbook. I’m happy to send you that if people want to grab that. It’s kind of how we shift from kind of that doing and showing up to really being more discerning about what we show up for, what we engage with, and what we give our time and attention to? So I can give you that link if you’d like.

 

Manon Bolliger  45:52

Sure, that’d be great. Okay, great. Well, thanks very much, and we’ll be in touch with you.

 

Jennifer Tolo  45:59

All right, great. Thank you, Manon. Have a great day.

Ending

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